The Courage to Be Seen
Why Showing Up as Yourself Changes Everything
Andrea Wright I Published on Link/Site
I have struggled for years to believe that my speaking style is good enough. I’d watch dynamic, high-energy speakers command a room, their voices rising and falling with perfectly timed emphasis, their hand gestures landing with precision. And I’d think, that’s what a great speaker looks like. That’s what I need to be.
But every time I tried to match that style, it felt forced like I was wearing someone else’s clothes, two sizes too big or too small. No matter how much I tried to stretch into it, it never quite fit.
Recently, my coach helped me see something I had never recognized in myself: I have a quiet leadership style. When I speak, I don’t need to be the loudest person in the room. My presence creates a sense of calm, a space where people feel safe enough to lean in and really listen.
That sounded nice in theory, but was it enough?
The Moment I Chose to Lean In
At a recent conference, I made a decision. Instead of trying to be what I thought a speaker should be, I would embrace the speaker I actually am. No over the top theatrics. No trying to add extra energy that wasn’t natural for me. Just me, fully present, speaking from my truth.
And guess what? I wasn’t afraid this time. I didn’t let the less than feeling creep in. I stood there, steady, confident, and unapologetically myself.
After my session, a woman approached me and said something that stopped me in my tracks.
“I want to work with you,” she said. “Your calming demeanor and quiet leadership drew me in. When I work on myself, I need to have that kind of energy with me.”
That’s when it hit me: The very thing I had been trying to fix was the thing that made me stand out. My presence wasn’t too small. It was exactly right for the people who needed it.
The Cost of Staying Invisible
So many of us hide parts of ourselves because we think they aren’t good enough. We believe we have to be louder, bolder, more charismatic, anything other than what we naturally are. And in doing so, we disconnect from what makes us powerful
Last month, I explored this idea in my blog Are You Living Someone Else’s Life? How we often follow expectations that aren’t our own, shaping our lives around what others believe we should be. This struggle doesn’t just apply to careers or life choices; it happens in the small ways we show up (or don’t) every single day. The fear of not fitting in, of not being "enough," can keep us from stepping fully into who we are meant to be
But here’s the truth: The right people don’t need you to be more of something else. They need you to be more of you.
If I had continued to fight against my own style, I might have repelled the very people who are drawn to what I uniquely offer. The cost of staying invisible is missing out on those connections, the ones where you don’t have to prove yourself because the right people already see you.
The Power of Being Seen
When you have the courage to be seen fully, as yourself, you attract the people who are meant for you. You don’t have to chase them. You don’t have to convince them. They find you because you are standing exactly where you are meant to be.
So, if you’ve ever felt like you need to change who you are to fit in, let this be your permission slip to stop. Whatever it is that makes you you, your quiet energy, your deep thinking, your steady presence that’s your strength. And the right people? They’re looking for exactly that.
Have the courage to be seen. You might be surprised who’s been waiting to find you.
